What We Went Through In March

Hello friends and loyal readers of Pathos Literary Magazine.

It’s been awhile, and trust me when I say that I wish more than anything that I could see each and every one of you. I am regretful of the fact that this blog has not been updated since February, but I imagine that many of you have also felt slightly frozen by the events that transpired in March. There is no way around avoiding the scary word that has been haunting the hallways of our reality, and yet I feel almost reluctant to mention it here in this safe space.

So how about we don’t?

How about we get real about the pain, and the anger, and the fear, and the anxiety, and we allow for these feelings to exist just as strongly and loudly as that damn thing that shall not be named? I am writing on this blog today because I feel as if there could not be anything else to do. Sure, I could be attending to the homework that has been staring at me for the past few days, untouched and lingering near. Or I could perhaps clean the shadow realm that grows by the day under my bed. Maybe now is as good as time as any to give myself a much overdue haircut.

There is a chance that you all can relate to this static feeling of being pulled towards all of your responsibilities that you suddenly have way more time to focus on, while simultaneously being gripped by the uncertainty of our future as a global people. At least, I am hoping that I am not completely alone in experiencing the duality of productivity and paralysis. I of course would never wish this on any of you lovely readers, but I do harbor a hope that if you can relate to anything I’ve said, please know that you are not alone. 

What we went through in March, and what we continue to endure for an unforeseen amount of time, is something that has physically separated us while somehow connecting us through a common occurrence. Many of us lost our jobs, cancelled our plans, called our loved ones, and shrank at the feet of the daily news that came to our door only to deliver more bad news. It has been difficult to imagine navigating through this school year, and if you are like me with your graduation (oh sorry… virtual ceremony) looming around the corner, the thought of completing any school work during a global pandemic sounds downright insane. Shouldn’t we be prepping for the end of the world?

Maybe.

But also, maybe not.

Maybe what we went through in March is only the beginning of adapting to relearning how to love ourselves and one another. Now, more than ever, we have to work together in our communities to ensure that we will have a future together. Social distancing does not mean you cannot call your loved ones and remind them what they mean to you. Continue practicing taking care of your health, washing your hands, and being generous with your love and affection. Remember to save some for yourself because you deserve and you need it just as much as your neighbor does. Be kind to yourself and the limited few you have around you. If you have not written or created anything since February, do not let the weight of this fact crush you. Let it come to you, and be patient when it does not.

I sat in front of my laptop for quite awhile, trying to find the words to share with you today. I still do not quite think I have done my job in bringing you the comforting literature I have been seeking since March, but I hope you can forgive me as I am still learning to forgive myself. I thought for a moment today at the grocery store, while wearing a mask and plastic gloves, fumbling between buying fruit or toilet paper, that maybe I had found the words I lost. I didn’t find them in the sink where I scrubbed my hands for 30 seconds, humming a tune that made little difference to my mood. I didn’t find them in the distance between me and the neighbor in the elevator. I didn’t find them this morning when I woke up on the edge of my breath.

But here friends, with you, I am slowly coming across what I really want to say.

I want to say that I love all of you. I want to say that I miss your presence in the Pathos community. I want to say that we will get through this together, and maybe that’s all that needs to be said right now because it’s the truest thing I could think to relay to you.

Please stay tuned for more frequent updates and blog posts. We have some exciting things that we will be working on this quarter and even if we have to extend our love to a virtual platform, we are still a community of literary lovers and art fanatics.

The latest issue of Pathos has been published, though we are still working on getting it uploaded digitally for all of you to enjoy. Keep an eye out for when we announce who made it into the magazine, and who will be featured on our blog!

With all of my love and warmth, I look forward to serving my last term as your Copy Editor. Here’s to looking forward to what we’ll go through in April, together.